jealousy

It crept up upon me suddenly yesterday. Then I fell asleep with this twisted, ugly creature, I woke up with it, and it is following me around now. It whispers nasty things in my ear. It mocks me for everything I do, everything I believe in, everything I am, it even mocks me for allowing it to creep up in the first place. It is a lingering thought lurking on the back of my mind, and it isn't a pretty one. It is a little nausea on the back of my stomach which obeys the lurking ugly feeling, acting as its bitter little minion.

I have known this sick little creature quite well, for a long time. I usually manage to keep my reactions to it under control, sort of, but my disgust for it always shows in my face. I hadn't seen it for a while, and for that while I felt truly free – I didn't miss it at all. It is back now, and I didn't see it coming.

I am punishing you for fooling yourself. You should know better.

You have made your point. Please go away now.